Sunday, 22 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (True Love) Episode 15 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 22, 2016 with 10 comments
Sanskar's POV:
It was raining cats & dogs outside. Swara leaned her head on my shoulder by holding my hands tightly. She was no longer sobbing. I gazed her sleepy eyes & said,"Swara! You need rest. Go & sleep in your room.." However after listening to me, she gripped my hands more rigidly. I thought that might be she was worried for me so she wasn't interested to leave me.

I said in a confident tone,"I am fine. Look you have already made the stitches. Don't worry about me. Now go & sleep. Otherwise you will fall ill." Without moving an inch, she replied,"Don't push out me from yourself. Am I a burden to you, sanskar? Please answer me na! Why has everybody neglected me? Am I that spoiled creature whose responsibility none is interested to take care of?" & by saying so, she covered her face inside my palms.

I was worried for her condition now. She was going through an emotional chaos & by looking at her sensitive condition, I said in a consoling tone,"No swara! The hard times that you go through to build your character, have made you a much stronger person. You are a gem & your relationship with me is my treasure. I am right here with you & I am not pushing you away from me."

I grabbed her more tightly to give her solace & promised myself that no matter whatever might be the situation, I wouldn't leave her now. This life was only belonged to her, to take care of her. She had shown a shining path to this slayer, now it was my responsibility to nurture her.

To divert her mind, I said,"Swara! Are you taking your medicines properly?" Quickly she took out her face from my palms & in a surprising look asked,"Sanskar! How do you know about my disease? & yes! Always I have forgotten to ask you regarding my survival in that dark cellular jail.. I mean how can you know about my disease & my medicines?"

I just smiled & said,"Swara! Don't forget, I am a slayer & that time you are my target. While I am stalking you, you must have remembered one day I have dropped you in this place as you are heavily drunken. That day I have collected those information about your health.."

She breathed a sign of relief & said,"Oh! Now I get you. No doubt you are a perfect slayer and a stalker as well.." By saying so, she grinned funnily. I was overwhelmed with her dazzling smile. At least I could make her smile. I could die thousand births to make her happy.. Just after a few minutes, she stopped smiling & said,"Sanskar! Do you know why I prefer to stay here?"

I looked at her shockingly & nodded negatively. She said in a depressing tone,"This place is away from the crowding. The everlasting summer fills my heart with laughter like a blooming flower. The diverse sounds of birds, nature's symphony, sprinkle delight & comfort of ocean breeze need no attest & this uniqueness of nature revives my soul & its melodious cool breeze comforts my stress level. Apart from that I want to give privacy to my patents. Though shekhar suryavansi doesn't love me, still he loves my mom a lot & my presence in my real home only brings dispute & arguments. So, I prefer this place to stay away from all the hassling situations."

I was just stunned after hearing from her. I was unable to express my feelings. I thought,"How can a person be so selfless & so pure? She is caring for that person, who has never accepted her as his daughter..." My unspoken words & ardent emotions were prevailing inside the room. A few minutes silence were passed in between us.

Just then the brewing lightning & chilling thunder sparkled & suddenly she grasped me tightly in fear. In a hesitating tone, I said,"If you want, we can share the bed. Don't take me wrong as you are sleepy & also terrified by the thunderstorm, so, I just want to help you to get rid of sleepless nights.." She just uttered a single sentence,"I trust you more than myself..." By saying so, she slept by my side.

I tried to avoid my gaze from her so as to not make her uncomfortable. A few minutes passed with complete silence. I didn't know how to start a conversation with her again. I just murmured a song to divert her concentration towards me.

'Just a smile & the rain is gone
Can hardly believe it
There's an angel standing next to me
Reaching for my heart.'

Even if I was singing the song to get her attention, but somewhere in my thoughts, her dazzling smile, radiant face, expressive eyes & lustrous lips were agitating & diverting my gaze towards her. I turned to look at her & in the mean while she had already gone to the lap of sleeping goddess. Her face was glowing & shining like an angel. I felt like touching it but I forbid my urges as I didn't want to touch her without her consent.

'I lay my love on you
It's all I wanna do
Every time I breath I feel brand new
You open up my heart
Show me all your love & walk right through
As I lay my love on you.'

I looked at her intensely as whatever I was now, it was all because of her. This change was for my good only. I felt anew like I had taken birth again. It wasn't at all easy to break my hazy heart but she slipped under my skin, invaded my blood & seized my heart.

I remembered my mom's saying, after she faced the betrayal of my father,'The sweetest love would never last forever, because it would end before the sweet is gone. And true love is never going to be sweetest love because true love would walk you through the fire & poison in life & I wish my son could find true love unlike the sweetest love I have got.' Now I could proudly convey my mom that,"I have found out true love, mom! I have passed herculean storms before getting her as my true love. She is the purest soul & her love is one of a kind.."

Though I had no contact with laksh after my accident, still I thanked him today as this journey had got its destination because of his support & persuasion. I wanted to contact him but I didn't have his number. Unknowingly swara was crawling on me & I extended my hands on her shoulder to give her protective cover & closed my eyes with many blissful thoughts.


Credit to:Kashis

Saturday, 21 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Acceptance) Episode 14 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 21, 2016 with 6 comments
Swara's POV:
While he was narrating the dreadful past of his life, I was just comparing the situations of my life with his circumstances.. We both were devoid of fatherly love. When I was unable to love my so called dad, then how would he love his dad who was a killer of his mother? His dad destroyed three innocent lives. That man loved his mother still was having an affair with another Lady. How shameful!! His dad not only destroyed a paradisal family but also ruined the dignity of a woman.

Though sanskar was a criminal but he was undoubtedly different from his dad.. My mind was just blank while thinking about the brutality & harshness man possessed behind the so called insane love! I kept numb & he was leaving me forever as he didn't want to be a burden on me.

As soon as I controlled my emotions, I found him nowhere. Oh god! What had I done?? I hurt him so badly that he was leaving me. No, he couldn't leave me like that. He couldn't make me a culpable in my own eyes. I rushed towards outside & he was going to open the gate. I embraced him from behind just to stop him from proceeding further. I pled him to stop there & luckily without any objection, he stopped there.

In a sorrowful tone, I pled," I am sorry sanskar for doubting you. You can punish me for my mistake but don't curse me by going from here." He was still standing in the same position and I embraced him tightly & said,"Darkness can't drive out darkness. Only light can do that. Hate can't drive out hate. Only love can do that. How can I hate you after knowing your sufferings? And anger is just an instant reaction before knowing the whole truth, sanskar! How can I loathe you even after knowing that you have felt antipathy through out your life. Every time you are dejected but not anymore! Hate can never molten your compiling obscurity, only love can do that... So, I don't hate you sanskar, in fact I ..........."

Oh gosh!! What was I going to tell him?? He quickly turned & in a choking tone replied,"Really you don't hate me, swara! You don't know how much relieved I am now.. There are always darkness in my life & there are no lights until you have come in my life. You are the light of all lights for me, swara! Nobody has ever tried to rectify me until you have shown your divine grace upon me.."

Thankfully he didn't notice my sayings properly and I leaned my head on his chest to give him solace. However, the truth was that I was getting the real bliss. All shadows of clouds the sun couldn't hide like the moon couldn't stop the oceanic tide; but a hidden star could still be smiling at night's black spell on darkness & beguiling its subduedness.
Likewise in whatever way I might try to subdue my emotions for him but deep inside the corner of my heart, a burning particle of desire was still alive for him which wanted to overthrew his darkness and to engulf him in the beam of radiant illuminations..

Breaking the hug, he said,"Thank you is a mere word in front of you. Whatever you have done with me, I can't repay it through out my life even if I will try. However I have to go now. My presence only leads to your destruction. You are a butterfly & I am a fire. If I will stay here then your life will be extinguished soon.." It meant he had made up his mind to leave me.

How could I stay without him? Why did I feel helpless like someone was taking away my soul from my human torso? Might be apart from him, nobody was there to share my pain, to care for me, to love me.. Wait! Was it love?? Was I deeply in love with him? Oh god! These feelings were so confusing.. But right now, I had to stop him. I couldn't let him go.

Suddenly I said,"Sanskar! Do you know one thing? If you save somebody's life, that life belongs to you. So, technically you belong to me & you aren't going anywhere..." I made a furious face as to exhibit the seriousness of my sayings.

Sanskar's POV:
Finally swara forgave me. But I couldn't afford to push her life into danger. My past would surely hunt me & before that I had to leave her for her safety. But what did she say just now? I belonged to him. Seriously! Did she mean it? Before sometimes I rejected this same thought & now she was giving acceptance to it. Breaking my thoughts, she said,"I know sanskar, you must be worried about your past.. But life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain.."

Intelligent girl!! No nicely she could portray my state of mind. Her each & every sayings touched my heart. I couldn't waste my life fearing about my past. I had to move on & might be my mom would be happy & forgive my earlier mistakes because of it. Suddenly from no where it started drizzling & i grabbed her hands to rush inside the room.

Due to running, two stitches were opened up & swara was hell worried after seeing this. In a concerning tone, she was yelling,"Sanskar! I am sorry. It is all because of me. If I haven't doubted on you, then you won't go outside & your stitches will be intact with your body. Oh god! I have to do the bandages again, it will take some more days for your recovery.." & by saying so, she started sobbing..

All I could say was,"Please don't cry swara! Your sadness is giving me more pain than these stitches...." She gave me injection & performed the bandages again. All I was doing was secretly taking glances of her & her concerns towards me. After this work was done, I just asked her casually,"Swara! Can you share your secrets with me?" Cutting my words, she said,"I don't have any secrets, sanskar! Now keep quiet & sleep. You need it..."

I nodded & said," Some old wounds never truly heal but by sharing it, at least your pain will be lessened." By saying so, I closed my eyes & just then i heard her voice,"At least you have seen your mom, sanskar. But I am that unfortunate fellow who hasn't seen her mom in reality. She has never loved me & left me due to the societal fear as when she has conceived me, she isn't married. And about my father, I am still ignorant. Shekar Suryavansi is the husband of my foster mom, Annapurna Suryavansi. He has never loved me like her daughter. He has always tortured me & my childhood has spent in a turmoil..."

She stopped suddenly & her eyes were filled with tears. For sometimes, I thought that my pain was nothing in front of her. This girl had never got parental love & was still living in mirage about her real mom. At least I was sure about my parental identity but swara! She even didn't know that..

However this wasn't the correct time to reveal about Shomi,so, I just wiped out her tears & said,"Truth has many sides, swara! What ever you have learnt about your real mother mayn't be the whole truth..." Cutting my words, in rage, she asked,"What do you want to tell sanskar? Whatever my grandfather has told about that lady shomi suryavansi is false. Do you want to say that? Or do you want to clear her image in front of me? She has left me sanskar. She has never tried to meet me once in my life. I have only seen her photograph. How can a women be so heartless sanskar that she won't come to meet me once. Has she even remembered about me? I guess "NO"...." & she cried like a baby.

I was already aware about the gravity of the situation & this situation wasn't at all in my favour for unveiling the truth. I consoled her & she clasped my hands tightly. Tears were coming before she could stop them, boiling hot then instantly freezing on her face... I didn't wipe them this time as what was the point in wiping them off? Or pretending when the heart could no longer handle the pain? So, I let them fall and its warmth was endorsing me....


Credit to: Kashis

Thursday, 19 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Behind The Mist) Episode 13 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 19, 2016 with 14 comments
Swara's POV:
Sanskar was too stubborn. He always neglected my commands. But today he crossed all the limits. In this situation also, he carried me to my room. It was barely 15 days & his wounds weren't recovered fully. However as if he ever listened to me!!

But he had seen the photoframe which i had found from his jacket. He wanted to know the cause behind keeping this photo frame in my room. I narrated the reason behind it & waited for his answer. But his answer made me awestruck. All my trust upon him was a mirage, I thought. Like a chameleon who had the dexterity to change its body colour likewise sanskar was also changing his colours depending upon the situation. However the basic fact couldn't be negated that he was a slayer like the way a chameleon could never be an admirable creature even if it had the colour changing ability, still it would always remain like a tiny mere reptile...

I distanced myself from him & he fell on the ground in a miserable condition. Though I cared for him, still an unknown hatred was compiling against him. My brain & heart were at loggerheads. My heart couldn't believe my hearing as what I had felt for him couldn't go wrong..

Suddenly I asked him,"How can you do that, sanskar? Don't you feel shame while killing your father? People like me are craving for father's love but you are the unfortunate one, who himself has extinguished his life..." At once, I saw change in his facial reactions. His jawbones were tightened. His eye colour was transforming to crimson red like I had awaken a sleeping lion. Now whom I was viewing was no longer sanskar, whom I saved rather an invincible, deadly & ruthless slayer was standing in front of me..

In an outrage, he yelled,"Don't be judgmental swara by knowing the half truth." This man could never change, I made up my mind & said,"Ah! So sanskar! Are you trying to give justification of your killing of your father? What ever justification you may give, sanskar but the truth can never be changed that you are a killer, a bloody murderer.. I am ashamed that I have trusted you... For you, I hate myself now sanskar...." I tried to remain strong but from inside I was ruining....

Sanskar's POV:
She hated me.. Over the top, she hated herself after trusting me.. She reminded me about my stature. I was sanskar maheswari, a bloody slayer.. Whatever I might do, but this past of mine would haunt me till eternity.. But could I bear her hatred for me now? Wait sanskar! Why were you exaggerating this outcome? Wasn't this an obvious reaction? I turned out to be a horrible person & I had no one to blame but myself..

For a few days, she cared for me that didn't mean she belonged to me. It was a reality check sanskar! And I had to accept it. From past 15 days, I was living in a mirage. I thought to leave my past and continue a decent lifestyle. But hope & every desire wouldn't be fulfilled always...

She had every right to bestow her anger upon me but for that she needed to know the truth. After knowing the truth, if she would still hate me, then it was absolutely fine for me as it was nothing new for me. In a heavy tone, I said,"Swara! Just listen to me once. After knowing the truth, if you will hate me then don't worry, I won't force you to trust me ever. And believe me, i won't be a burden on you anymore & you don't have to handle me everyday in front of you.. But please listen to me once..." I pled her & she agreed.

I started narrating my dreadful past & said,"My father Ram prasad bijlani & mother Sujata bijlani fell for each other during their teen age. As you must have known that good looks attract the eyes & personality attracts the heart. My father has an eye candy appearance & he has always provided mom with luxurious & expensive gifts. And in teen age, all these things attract the human beings. Nobody scrutinizes about personality in this period.. The same happens with my mom as well. Both of them have loved each other & married finally."

Cutting my words, swara said,"This is like a fairy tale love story, sanskar.. Everything is just perfect. Then why do you kill your dad... Tell me fast." I just asked her to keep patience & narrated,"Every love story doesn't have a destination swara. The attitude of human being changes frequently sometimes. Initial years of their marriage are running smoothly but after my birth, my dad has given less time to my mom. My mom has even celebrated their anniversary without my dad's presence & with her photograph only. Many nights, my dad hasn't come to home & I have seen sobbing of my mother in the corner of a room..."

My heart was filled with pain & anguish for my mom & a lot more agony for my dad. I couldn't even utter a word & just then breaking the silence, swara asked,"Why has your father behaved like this?" Here came the reality check.. Could swara bear the truth of Mayuri & her real mother Annapurna Suryavansi? She had just stayed 15 days with me still she couldn't bear my truth. Then how could she handle the lie of her real mother? 'No', she would be devastated and I couldn't see her breaking into pieces. I didn't have that much courage to reveal this fact to her. I just couldn't do that..

Swara patted her hand on my shoulder & I said,"Because my dad is having an affair with some other lady. For him, he is already taking the responsibility of my mom & me. So, whatever he is doing outside, mustn't be included in his private life.." Swara widened her mouth like she had heard something illogical thing & asked,"It means your dad is cheating your mom? But who is that another lady? Does she know about your father's marital life??" I didn't know how to handle the situation & it was gradually going out of my hand.

In a fumbling tone, I said,"Yes! He is cheating both of them & I ... I don't know that another lady.. But perhaps she also doesn't know about my dad's marital life...." I didn't have enough confidence to reveal about Mayuri aka shomi suryavansi. Swara already hatred her & was staying in an illusion.. And it was just not possible in my part to break her mist. But shomi had already gone through a lot in her life. Though I couldn't divulge regarding her truth still I didn't want hatred of swara for her. Avoiding all these topics, I said,"One day my mom has come to know about his extramarital affair & about his real personality of an extortionist.. Ya!! My father is an extortionist and the king of drugs, smuggling & racketing world..."

Swara was taken aback & in a painful tone, she said," I am feeling sorry for your mother, sanskar.." In a consoling tone, I said,"After knowing the truth, my mother has complained in police station & my dad is jailed. Due to money & heavy political pressure, he has come out of the jail early.. But his evilness has shot up. He has blamed mom for everything. My mom doesn't want me to be like him. She always inculcates good morals & nice human values in me. And one fine morning my father can't take this anymore. For him, it is all a drama & me and my mother are rubbish humans.. According to him, my mom has betrayed him by exposing his business. He has shot mom in front of me but spared me as he has wanted me as his heir for his illegal business. That bloody man has taken away everything from my life. In a child's eyes, a mother is a goddess. She can be glorious or terrible, benevolent or filled with wrath but she commands love either way.. But my dad has filled her life with sorrow & wanted me to be like him.. Eventually I have come in contact with captain. He has trained me with sharp shooting skills & my father is my first assassination & I don't feel ashamed for it...."

Swara was motionless. A single word was also not coming out of her mouth. After taking a brief pause, I said,"This is what I am swara! And yes! I am a slayer. I don't feel ashamed about it. As the day I have become slayer, I have killed my human emotions. Look! What my dad has made me. A bigger criminal than him... My mom's biggest fear has also come true...I can't change my past, swara..."

After listening all these things also, she became numb. It meant she could never forgive me. Then I had to leave this place now as I didn't want to be a burden for her. I grabbed her hand & bent my head & said,"Anger is like flowing water; there is nothing wrong with it as long as you let it flow. Hate is like stagnant water, which becomes dirty, stinky, disease-ridden, poisonous & deadly. Be angry upon me but never hate me swara. Please it is a request...."

Her silence was showing her decision. Avoiding her sight, I tried to go out of this place as if I would see her again then I couldn't bear the separation. I walked slowly with much pain both inside & outside my body. As soon as I reached to the outside gate, two strong hands embraced me from behind & I heard her voice,"Please don't go. Don't leave me alone. I have hurt you beyond words. But don't go like this..." And gradually her grips were becoming stronger on my shoulder..


Credit to: Kashis

Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Without Her) Episode 12 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 18, 2016 with 10 comments
Sanskar's POV:
My thoughts broke down when I heard swara's voice. "So, you are the 3rd suspect?", she asked in a surprising tone. It meant swara had heard all the news & now she was definitely going to hate me as she didn't want my killing of innocent people. Oh wait!! But they weren't innocent na! In a fumbling tone, I replied,"Trust me! I don't want to kill them. They have attacked me first. If I won't kill then they must have killed me. And these two guys are also tried to molest you. So, I couldn't..........."

I was unable to complete the sentence. How could I say that I felt there was some connection between us & for that reason whenever I saw Alex & Martin, I couldn't control my rage after remembering the incidents they had tried to do with you. But surprisingly in a calm voice, she said,"I don't want any explanation sanskar! I know you aren't at all bad from heart & yes! When I have met you that night, you are severely beaten & shot.. So, for self defense, you must have fired the bullets. And don't be sad as I will never blame you for their killing.. I trust you, Sanskar..."

I couldn't believe what I had heard.. Trust!! Did she really utter the word trust? What the hell was wrong with her? How could she trust me so easily within merely 15 days? This attitude of her always attracted me towards her even if I tried to move away.

She handed over a bowl of oats to me & sat besides me on the sofa. I still couldn't resist myself from alluring towards her like a honeybee couldn't bear separation from its hive & her closeness was making my temptations irresistible. I tried to part away from her & randomly changed the channels to divert my mind...

A mixture of emotions, feelings & sensations were running inside my body like an adrenaline rush. Some movie was going on the TV. But my mind & concentration was only upon swara. To avoid her ocean like blue eyes which had the capability to engulf all my burning feelings towards her, I was looking away from her.

After sometimes, I felt a weight on my shoulder. She had already leaned on my shoulder and her hands were wrapped around my waist. The lustrous, feather like hairs were spreading on her temple. I sided her hairs behind one corner of ear & took glances of her sparkling face. Unknowingly I uttered,"You look beautiful, swara! Don't come too close to me. Don't make it too difficult for me to move away from you. The sooner I leave you, the sooner will be your safety..."

Suddenly I felt guilty as due to taking my responsibility, she was so tired that she slept on sofa. She needed a sound sleep. So, I decided to pick her to her room not to disturb her sleep. I carefully picked her milky, soft, porcelain body on my harsh & tough hands & proceeded towards her room.

I knew that I was going to hear her shouting again for this crime of mine of picking up her to her room. But anything for her!! She was showing too much concern for me, couldn't I take a minimal care of her?? While I was thinking all these aspects, I reached to her room & placed her on the bed. This was the 2nd time, I was coming here but the situations were entirely different. I covered her in bed sheet & as soon as I proceeded to move out of the room, my eyes fell upon the table where along with the picture of her, some other photo frame was also kept.

I was overwhelmed with joy like I got some hidden treasure after ages. This photo was kept in my jacket which I had given to swara during her escaping. This was the only photo I had with my mom. I never thought that she would keep it as a photo frame that to in her room like a precious object.

My emotions were surging like the tsunami in the mid sea. I gently kissed her forehead to show my gratification to her. I could never payback the debt she was bestowing on me happily. I grabbed the photo frame tightly & placed it closure to my heart. A few drops of tears were coming out of my eyes & falling upon her forehead. Not to disturb her sleep, I wiped out my tears & placed that photo frame gently on the table.

As soon as I tried to move out, she held my hands & said,"How do I come here, sanskar?" I knew that the time had come to hear her shouting again. I bent my head slightly & said,"Actually, you have slept on sofa... So, I have picked up you to your........" & she didn't even let me complete my sentence. As expected, cutting my words, she yelled,"How can you be so childish sanskar? Can't you wake up me? Let me check your bandages.. Is it still properly intact or not??" By saying so, she started her examination upon me.

I grabbed her hands tightly & by showing the photo frame, I asked her," What is this swara? Why have you kept it here?" Her facial reactions were changed & after taking a brief pause, she humbly replied,"I have got it from your jacket. I have found similarity between you & the boy present in this picture, like you are the grown up version of this boy. However I can't understand the change of nature you possess now.. The boy in the picture is too bubbly but you are too harsh. Like a puzzle piece, you always haunt in my brain. Are you the same person who has killed a man in that dark cellular jail & also helped me in escaping?? I am just too curious to know about you... And from past 15 days, I have heard your screaming in sleep like 'don't kill my mom' & some words like captain, child; you have frequently uttered. I just want to share your pain as nobody is evil from birth. And this photograph is half torn. So, I want to know the connection between all the happenings...." She was showing a blank expression in her face like she was expecting some answers of these unanswered queries...

I kept numb as she had already known the half truth of my life. And now she was expecting to know the whole truth. But how could I say the truth of my life to her. Breaking my thoughts, she said,"It's OK sanskar! If you don't trust me to share your pain, then I won't force you.." She left the grip of my hands to let me go. How could she even think that I had trust issues with her.. I quickly grasped her hand & said,"Swara! How can you think like that?? You have saved my life. If I don't trust you, then who the hell will trust you?"

She kept her another hand over my hand & in an assuring tone asked,"Then what's the problem in sharing your pain?" If I can see pain in your eyes, then share with me your tears. If I can see joy in your eyes then share with me your smile, then I will be more than happy..." Huh!! Girls were the most unpredictable creatures of Almighty.. For the first time in my life, somebody wanted to share my pain... Crazy enough undoubtedly!!

In a deep woe, I said,"I can share! But can you bear the truth of my life??" Drops of tears were rolling down from my cheeks.. She wiped my tears & said,"Sanskar! I have seen much more torture in my life. I can bear & engulf any sorrow & sufferings." I took a long breath & by showing the photo frame, I said,"she is my mom, swara! I love her a lot.. My father & mother have fallen for each other during their teen age. But he has killed my mom later...." I was unable to say more...

Swara in her shocking expression asked,"What? How? They have loved each other.. Then why has your dad killed your mom?? & where is your dad now??" Here came the most awaited question.. In a stern voice, I replied," I have killed my dad...."

Swara was taken aback. She was horrified. At once, she left my hands leaving me completely shocked. I already imagined about this repercussion.. I had lost her, I felt lost in this world. She was my guide, my light. I ruined everything now. She was gone forever. Oh god! Why did I share the truth! I fell on ground in a miserable condition...


Credit to:Kashis

Tuesday, 17 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Being Human) Episode 11 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 17, 2016 with 6 comments
Laksh's POV:
I reached to hospital to collect the reports. The medical history of Shomi Suryavansi didn't attract my attention much as I was ignorant about her case. I just checked her report casually. But swara's report definitely agitated my thoughts. She was facing the first stage of alcoholic neuropathy. Though it could be cured by long term meditation but it might affect her motherhood. She mightn't able to conceive in future due to her sexual dysfunction. How could I reveal this fact to Sanskar, that to in this state when he himself wasn't out of danger.

Distracting my thoughts, my phone buzzed. It was the call from captain. As soon as I picked up, he said in a flat tone,"Laksh! You must be aware about sanskar's death. ." With fumbling tone, I replied,"Yes captain!" In a grinning tone, he said,"Aha! You are stammering. You must be worried about his death as he is close to you." I tried to remain carefree & replied,"Nothing like that captain! There is no place for a betrayer in our dark world.."

Cutting my words, captain said,"oh! Come on laksh! Everybody knows in our gang regarding your friendship with sanskar. You can mourn over his death.." The voice of captain sounded intriguing, like he wanted to pour out information regarding sanskar from my mouth. I tried to remain grim & stern in my expression as I didn't want my buddy,Sanskar to return to that heinous world again. A ray of hope had already entered in his life and I didn't want to extinguish it by conveying the truth to captain.

In a forbidding voice, I said,"A betrayer can never be my friend, captain." Captain smiled simperingly & said,"Good progress laksh! But he is my best slayer. He is the lion of this empire. His sudden demise isn't fully acceptable to me. But anyways, he is dead now..." I nodded captain & he disconnected the call.

I was in despair, aware that something fatal was going to happen in future. Again my phone ringed & this time it was swara. As soon as I picked up, I asked her helplessly,"How is sanskar?" Swara in a jolly tone replied,"He has regained his consciousness, Laksh. It is possible because of you. Thank you so much laksh for being a real friend." I was exultant but suppressed my feelings in front of her & said,"Take care of him, swara." In a dull voice, swara said,"But laksh, he doesn't want to check up from you. He is so stubborn.. He isn't at all listening to me.."

I was shocked. Had she told about me in front of sanskar? What must be sanskar's reaction? Did she know my truth? I was confused. So, I asked her in a depressing tone,"Have you told about me in front of him, swara?" She quickly replied,"Don't worry laksh! I haven't revealed your identity. I know that it's a police case & even if any investigation will be held in future, your name won't be disclosed. That's my promise."

I breathed a sense of relief, not because I was afraid of police but because swara would be safe & domino effect wouldn't be created in her life. It was required to stay away from sanskar for some days as captain was still apprehensive about his death. My proximity to him might reveal his survival secret. So, in a convincing voice, I said to swara,"Thank you for your understanding. And don't worry! Sanskar will be fine soon. Even I am also busy with hospital duties. So, I can't come to your place to examine him. Do as I have directed & give him medicines on time. Change his dressings & whenever you will face any problem, do call me. Everything will be fine soon..." I assured her regarding his recovery & disconnected the call.

The wind direction was changing. I could sense it. Was it the growing silence before the upcoming thunderstorm? The revolving wind direction wanted to make everybody its pawn. It was like the eye of the storm. The distant viewer could only notice the calmness but the central witness could judge the brewing thunder. This could wreak everything which came in its path, even the creator as well. I was afraid to face the future. The only genuine relation of my life had gone out of track. His survival was my responsibility now. I felt restlessness & it was gradually becoming part & parcel of my life.

Swara's POV:
My theory on life was that life was beautiful. Life didn't change. We had a day, a night, a month & a year. We, people changed. We could be miserable or we could be happy. It was what we made of our life. Once upon a time, I was his hostage but now my world revolved around him. Some how laksh's advice helped me a lot in taking care of sanskar. However he was very stubborn. I had to repeat my words many times in front of him. Otherwise he wouldn't listen to me.

I, purposefully scolded him to emphasize my words. Always he denied to me, only to finally accept it like a good boy! Yes good boy! He was no longer behaving like a slayer.In these fifteen days of staying with him, I was convinced that he wasn't at all devil from heart. A small child still resided in his cold heart. He didn't talk much but his silence conveyed his inner feelings.

Many nights, I heard some words like 'killing', 'mom' & 'child' from his mouth. Though I didn't understand about it, still I could feel the pain through which he was going on. Once he would be recovered fully, I would definitely share his sorrow to reduce the pain from his heart.

Right now! I was returning to home after doing lots of shopping for Sanskar. He didn't have a decent cloth to wear & also his mobile phone was lost at that deadly night. So, I purchased all the essentials for him. As soon as I reached home, I saw him roaming inside the house. I yelled,"Sanskar! Sit quietly. Why are you wandering? What if you will fall down? At least do these childish activities when I am present at home..." In a pout face, he said,"I am fine swara.. I am absolutely alright.." Cutting his words, I said,"Sanskar! Do you think yourself as a superman? It is barely 15 days from your accident.." In a stubborn tone, he said,"I hate to sit sluggishly inside a home.." To make him jolly, I said,"OK! Once you will recover fully, we will go outside to view the nature. Now check the essentials I have purchased for you & till then, I am making oats for us."

I freshened up myself & prepared oats for us. The focal point of my life was sanskar now. I felt bliss after taking care of him. Still I didn't know the cause behind this happiness. Might be nobody ever cared about me the way I was caring for him. Life was beautiful & I just noticed it now.

Sanskar's POV:
Time never waited for anything. Already 15 days had passed after that deadly night. Due to swara's immense care, I could now walk inside the home. Still she was too adamant not to allow me to do even my basic works. She was my everything now. She performed all the activities of cook, nurse, guardian & doctor. I felt like nurtured under her care. 'There was a mother in every lady', I thought this many times when I saw her concern towards me.

I wanted my speedy recovery as after that I would leave this place for her safety. Her care was making me weak in front of her. Even if I tried to avoid her gaze, but every now & then I fell for her & constantly glared at her unintentionally. Though every time I avoided her still sometimes I just wished her presence near me so I could tell her how much I needed her & how hard everyday had been without her..

Today, she had purchased many clothes for me as from 15 days I was wearing those bloodstain clothes. She had also given me a brand new mobile to communicate with her when she was outside. She again scolded me for my movement & now she was making oats for us. I sat quietly on sofa & switched on the TV.

While changing the channels, I stopped at a news channel as the death news of Alex & Martin were flashing on it. As per the news report, 2 dead bodies along with dangerous weapons were retrieved from that location. But police had found out 3 blood samples from that place. That 3rd blood sample didn't match with any criminal records. Genuine enough!! How could it match?? As that was my bloodstain & police had never caught me.

Fortunately police wasn't much interested in investigating the case & declared all of us as terrorists & presumably announced all of us as dead. Good for me!! That ruthless slayer was dead now. I was only Sanskar..Sanskar, as a human with human emotions & desires....

Credit to:Kashis

Monday, 16 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (A New Beginning) Episode 10 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 16, 2016 with 17 comments
Sanskar's POV:
Tonight was definitely an eye opener, but a reminder of how I used to be & why. Self discovery happened at such random times.. An invincible slayer was lying on the bed in a heavily injured state. I felt someone's hand on my chest. The room was filled with all the medical instruments. A girl was lying besides me. The lustrous curls were resting on her temple & as soon as I looked at her, I recognized her as Swara.

How could I forget her, for whom I tried to be a human again. What an irony!, the fate was playing with me!! Once upon a time, she was my hostage but now she was the cause to live my life & my saviour as well. At once, she heard my voice, she woke up & stared at me like she got some hidden treasure.

Certainly time worked like wonder. I tried to see a glimpse of her from past few months but she wasn't present here. But now, she was my saviour & I could see her intensely before leaving this place. Ya! I had to leave this place now as if my captain would come to know about my survival then swara would also come in the purview of danger & when the matter would come to her, I couldn't take any risk.

But she scolded me for my movement and ordered me to lie down on bed. Ordering a slayer!! It sounded funny! But honestly, I felt good. She was no longer afraid of me, it seemed & I admired her guts as the way she told that she was no longer my hostage; as if she was trying to say that now I was her hostage & therefore I had to obey her commands. But her objurgation was appealing to my eardrums.

As after many years, I found care in someone's eyes for me. However was I a worthy creature to be cared for? I was a slayer & my past would definitely haunt me. But now the truth which was haunting me was, where was I? & how was I saved? She narrated me all the incidents. It meant she hadn't informed the police but what if that another doctor would inform the police, then both of us would be in danger.

I wasn't at all worried for me as I had already lived my life, repented for my mistakes & even tried to correct those wrong doings. What more could I expect from my life?? But her life was just beginning. I would try my best to protect her from all the dangers. So, again I tried to wake up & go out from this place before that another doctor might inform police about me. But I didn't have much strength left to move even an inch.. Over the top,she was so much meticulous about my health that she was scolding me like I had done a massive crime due to my movement.

Finally I gave up against her wishes & lay down on the bed as my body wasn't supporting my movement as well. She went away somewhere after ordering me not to move again. After 15 minutes, she entered in the room with some food plates. I denied to eat them but she didn't pay heed to my words. I objected her in a low tone & said,"I don't feel like eating." To my utter dismay, she said,"I am not requesting you to take the food, Sanskar. I am directing you to take it without any questions. These foods are nutritious & will give you strength & help you for your early recovery."

I was feeling a lot of pain. So, I couldn't move my organs properly. She quickly held me from my bare shoulder & supported me to rest my head on the pillow. She was too close to me that the warmth of the air present in between us had raised to an optimum level. I hesitantly parted myself away from her as might be she was feeling uneasiness due to this closeness.

She grabbed the plate & started feeding me. Objecting her, I said,"Swara! I can eat myself." While I was trying to snatch the food plate from her hand, she yelled,"Sanskar! Don't behave like a stubborn guy! Don't move or else your stitches will be opened. This is for your good only. The sooner you eat, the sooner will be your recovery."

Her behaviour made me remember about my treatment towards her in the dark cellular jail. A feeble smile approached on my face after knowing the sweet payback she was giving to me. While feeding me, she again said,"Sanskar! Hope you are clear about my instructions! Better lie down on the bed & the moment you will try to escape from this place, then mind you! You will see a furious side of swara in front of you."

I just smirked & replied,"Aren't you afraid of a slayer? Threatening me!!! Huh! Seems you have lost your memory." She just smiled and bent my head to sip the glassful water & said," I am no longer your hostage sanskar! However you are my captive now! So, logically you will be afraid of me.." While she was giving me medicines, I asked,"So swara! Is this a revenge of my kidnapping you?" She just smiled & nodded her head & said,"Take rest Sanskar." & finally she left the room. 'Smart, courageous & intelligent girl!', how many shades did you possess swara?, I thought and drifted off quickly due to the high dose medicines.

Swara's POV:
Sanskar was fine now and I was debt free. Once he had saved me and now I got an opportunity to save him but was that all what I felt for him? Why did I feel immense bliss while taking care of him? I didn't try to explore the answers but I used to feed him as he wasn't at all comfortable in moving his locomotor organs. Though he was reluctant to take my help, but I insisted & scolded him to obey me or else the repercussion could be dangerous! Though I was kidding & exhibiting a false threatening, still he finally mended his ways towards my commands.

I gave him medicines & he had slept now. Sleeping was far away from my sight. I made coffee & while gulping it, I switched on the TV. However in every 15 minutes, I checked him to make sure he was sleeping or awake or needed anything. Around 4AM at night, while I was watching TV, I heard a noise from sanskar's room. I rushed to the room.

Stubborn guy! He never listened to me. I yelled,"Sanskar! What are you doing on the floor?" Making a pout face, he indicated towards the table & said,"Water!" I quickly placed his one arm over my shoulder & supported him by his waist & lifted him to the bed.

Every time I touched him, our closeness sparked echo of waves in my soul & light reflection in my heart. The power of his touch & serenity of his stride calmed down the undulating beats of my heart & graced me with eternal peace of mind. Breaking my thoughts, he again said in a lower tone,"I want water." I scolded him & while filling the glass, I said,"Why don't you listen to anybody? Why are you so stubborn? You don't take care of youself. At least let me do that for you. If you need anything at least call me."

I supported him to drink water & while drinking, he said,"I am not used to take anybody's help. Please don't ruin my lifestyle by taking so much care." He was impossible & treating him was genuinely difficult for anybody. Why was he so stubborn?, I thought. I took the glass from his hand & said,"Sanskar! You have saved my life earlier and now I am doing the same. Take it as a payback, not as help.. Then at least you will able to listen to me.."

He was looking at me continuously like I had said something wrong or else he had seen a ghost. Averting his gaze, I said,"Now sleep peacefully. My friend who has treated you will come to check you tomorrow." I could see change in his reactions & he said adamantly,"No, I am fine now. I don't want any check up. You listen to me swara! If any doctor will come, then I will escape for sure." I tried to convince him but as if he cared.

I said,"Sanskar! Please try to understand, I am not a doctor. Please agree for once." But seemed like he was too determined and nothing in this world could change his stance. I had no other ways left only to agree with his words or else he might try to escape which in my worst nightmare I didn't want. I said,"OK sanskar! Till you are fine, that doctor won't come. But for that you have to agree with my directions." He nodded & I covered him with bed sheet and wished him good night.

While I was moving out, he held my hands & said,"Can you please stay here for sometimes?" In a worried tone, I asked,"Are you alright? Do you want anything?" He just nodded & said,"Just stay besides me, please. I don't want anything else." I agreed and massaged his temple gently & patted his head to make him fell asleep.

I was about to leave him but might be due to impact of medicines, he babbled,"Mom has left me. Please you don't leave me, Swara!! Stay with me.." I couldn't move an inch further after hearing his words. A ruthless slayer had suppressed a lot of innumerable emotions inside his heart, I thought..

If I looked upon my whole life, I couldn't think of another time when I felt more comfortable, when I had no worries, fears or desires, when my life seemed as soft and lovely as lying inside a cocoon of rose silk. I grabbed his hands tightly in an assurance to never let him go & sat there by gazing his innocent sleepy look.


Credit to: Kashis

Sunday, 15 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Revival) Episode 9 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 15, 2016 with 10 comments
Laksh's POV:
Sometimes the future could be changed quickly & completely & we were left with only the choice of what to do next. We could choose to be afraid of it, to stand there trembling not moving, assuming the worst that could happen or we stepped forward into the unknown & assumed it would be brilliant. Wasn't my condition perfectly resembled with this?

When swara was apprehensive about the surgery, I gave her strength to face the unknown danger & then we could save him. While performing the surgery, my hands were shivering. Though as a doctor, this wasn't my first surgery but indeed it was a first surgery of a near & dear one. Always in our medical science, it was taught that a good surgeon operated with his hand, not with his heart.

Saying was much easier than doing. I had realised this statement today while operating Sanskar. Rules & regulations stopped performing their actions while the closed ones were suffering in pain. However swara didn't ask me regarding the trembling of my hands & I escaped from giving lame excuses.

As far as possible, I tried to remain calm & carefree about the patient, sanskar in front of swara. But as a smarty girl, she definitely raised her doubt regarding my change of behaviour about this case & fortunately I was able to convince her in the name of humanity. She thanked me for helping her but innocent girl! didn't know regarding this patient's position in my life. I just couldn't let him die...

I asked swara about the patient, sanskar. As according to her, I was ignorant about the patient & as a doctor I needed to have a basic information about the patient whom I treated. Though I knew that sanskar was her abductor still I gave a shocking expression, so as not to raise her doubts again. She didn't want to share much about sanskar with me & I didn't ask her much as I knew the series of events happened during her kidnapping. I told her to take rest but she denied.. After so much persuasion, she accepted to take some rest..

Today I saw the beginning of an epic love saga. The same anguish, pain and suffering; I saw for her in Sanskar's eyes when she was in miserable condition in that dark world. And the same history was repeating now though the position of swara & sanskar had changed. However ironically!! My position was same in both the conditions, like a butterfly who attracted by sweet nectar & helped to pollinate seeds to blossom the petals of the flowers... To flourish the meadows of love between these two petals, I didn't mind to become a butterfly again & again.

I entered the room where sanskar was lying.. I checked his heartbeats were becoming normal. I put the gun on the drawer as I knew that his past would definitely haunt him & for his safety, he would definitely require this gun. That night was passing gradually with lots of unexpected turns but I was clear about one thing,'Love cures people both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it..' & this love would evade all the darkness from sanskar's life. It would give him all the strength to fight with obscurity. I prayed for his long life & speedy recovery.

When I was busy with these thoughts, my phone buzzed. It was a call from the hospital. Reports of swara & shomi had already come & for collecting these reports, I got the call from hospital. Though I never wanted to leave sanskar alone but as these very works of swara and shomi were also given by him, so I decided to rush to hospital to examine the reports.. As far as sanskar's health condition was concerned, his heartbeats were functioning normal & sanskar was coming out of danger.

I went towards swara's room to wake up her. But she was sleeping peacefully. She must had so tired from these happenings that she needed a much required sleep... So I affixed a note about my departure from her home due to some medical issues on the door & left her house.

Swara's POV:
When I opened my eyes, it was morning & I had slept by holding that jacket. I rushed towards sanskar's room to check him. His heartbeats were normal but still he was lying unconscious. I called out laksh's name but got no response. I searched for laksh but he was found nowhere. I was going to dial his number but at once my sight fell upon the note affixed by laksh.

Quickly I disconnected the call after reading that note as I didn't want to disturb him. I freshened up myself and sat near sanskar. He was no longer looking like a slayer. His face was looking pale due to much blood loss. 'Who are you, Sanskar? Why have you chosen this darkness after having humanity still intact in your soul? Who are responsible for this condition of yours? Am I the cause for this, Sanskar?', there were so many untold questions were popping up in my mind but I couldn't ask them to anyone.

I massaged his head gently & said,"Wake up sanskar. You have slept a lot. Your silence is killing me. Please speak something.." The day was passing like this. At evening, I was busy in kitchen for making coffee, when I heard screaming from sanskar's room. I was scared like hell & rushed to check him.

'Please leave her dad. Don't kill mom. She loves you. I can't kill him captain. He is just a child.', this was all what sanskar was yelling again & again. His pulse rates & heartbeats were increasing which was deadly for his health. I was confused to see this sight. I grabbed his hands & rubbed it gently & said,"Calm down, sanskar. You don't need to kill anyone. You are a good human being & your mother is proud of you." Might be his subconscious mind heard my words & these words made their effects. Gradually his heartbeats were normal again. I kept my hand on his chest & stayed there only. I didn't know how many hours had passed!

"Swara", I heard my name & woke up. I checked the time & it was midnight. Sanskar was gazing at me with questionable eyes. Finally the long struggle of one day paid off. I was looking at him continuously to make myself realise that indeed he was fine & gained his consciousness. He tried to wake up & just then I realised that my hands were still placed on his chest. Hesitantly, I pulled back my hands & said,"What are you doing? Don't move. Your stitches are new. It may be opened up due to your movement." I gently rested his head on the pillow & that time he was noticing his body & the entire surroundings.

I could understand his curiosity to know about this place, so I said,"It's my house, sanskar. You have already come here earlier. You are safe here." But he behaved stubbornly & again tried to move. So, I commanded him,"Don't move. Lie down back. Now!! I am no longer your hostage rather your doctor.." He was totally surprised with my behaviour & did as per my command. With much pain, he asked slowly,"Doctor? Are you a doctor? And what about all these instruments!! Is this truly your home? Have you informed anyone?"

I just giggled at his questions & said,"No.. not a doctor basically as I haven't completed my medical yet. But yes! This is my first surgery & truly it is my home. I have arranged all the instruments here. As you are beaten badly & shot as well, so I haven't taken you to the hospital as it is a police case & your treatment can be delayed by that. So, I have treated you here with the help of a friend of mine, who is actually a doctor.."

His face was exhibiting a mixture of reactions & he said,"Another doctor?? Will he inform to police?? I need to go from here before police will come to know about this place." I grabbed his shoulder & said,"Dare to move again!! Lie down & don't worry.. He won't inform anyone about you as he is also a doctor & saving a patient is his 1st duty." However sanskar wasn't convinced with my answers & was staring at me. I ignored his gaze as saving him was my first priority. I instructed him to lie down quietly & went to kitchen to make soup for him...


Credit to:Kashis

Thursday, 12 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (A Choice) Episode 8 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 12, 2016 with 14 comments
Laksh's POV:
After ages, I heard swara's voice. She seemed worried. She wanted my help to save a patient. Sanskar had always told me about her courage. Today I had also admitted the fact of her being a courageous girl!! Otherwise who wanted to treat a patient where police angle was involved by threatening their career. But ya! She was different. Otherwise it wasn't easy to blossom the nascent odour of humanity from an invincible slayer. Initially I hesitated to treat the patient but I agreed due to our sake of friendship. But more I was agreed for Sanskar. As she wasn't a mere friend of mine rather a life of Sanskar, who had always stood by me in my thicks & thins. How could I deny his love then?? I got the address where I had to make all the necessary arrangements. I dialed sanskar's number to tell him about this incident but every time it was indicating an error signal of out of reach.

Might be sanskar had gone for solving any assignment, so the phone wasn't reachable, I thought. I concentrated on swara's work, as I could even tell this to sanskar after completion of the work. I made all the arrangements & now was travelling towards the address sent by swara. As soon as I reached there, I perceived a bird's eye view to the surroundings. This place was a bit away from the main dwellings. The calmness & serenity of this place could make anybody nostalgic. When I was exploring the beauty of this place, my phone buzzed. I thought that it must be swara but when I saw the caller ID, I came to know that the call was from a member of our gang from our dark world.

I picked up the call & what message he conveyed to me, had changed the situation upside down. I just scolded him for his lie. But again & again he was emphasizing the same talks. Before I could rebuke him, he yelled,"Laksh, it's up to you to believe me or not! But the fact can't be changed. Captain has already written Sanskar's name in his death book due to his betrayal.." I just couldn't control my rage & shouted,"Do you know about whom you are talking? He is the best slayer & respects captain. The question of betrayal must be an accusation only. Do you have any proofs to justify this fact?" He nodded negatively of having any proofs but convinced me about the authentication of this news. I couldn't take these nonsense talks anymore & disconnected the call.

Though I knew that this news couldn't be true but still I couldn't ignore this news. What if he was telling the truth but how could it be possible? My mind was jammed with many evil thoughts. I tried to contact Sanskar again & again. But everytime his call was out of reach. With each passing second, my mind was agitated. I was just going to start my car in search of sanskar, just then Swara's car reached there. After hearing about Sanskar's incident, for sometimes I was totally forgotten about swara & my purpose of coming here.

Now I was in perplexity. What should I do now? Would I go in search of Sanskar or else would I help swara to treat an unknown patient? As a friend, I should leave this place immediately for the search of Sanskar but as a doctor, my primary duty was to cure a person. This was a very critical situation for me. I had to make a choice. But this choice wasn't going to be easy one. We, human beings were free to make whatever choices we wanted, but we weren't free from the consequences of the choices. Which ever option I might choose, but still I would remain at the receiving end.

Breaking my thoughts, swara shouted,"Laksh! Please help me to take him out of the car."
I was so confused at that time that my mind had stopped from functioning & I just acted like a robot of swara's commands. As soon as I reached in front of swara's car, I saw that swara was struggling to take out that patient. I just asked her to let me do this work. She gave me free access to take out the patient. I bent my head & entered to the backside of the car. I froze at that moment when I saw the face of the patient. With intense anguish, I called," Saaannskar...." I was motionless. Just then I heard swara's voice. She was saying,"What are you doing inside the car, laksh? Take him out. We need to treat him urgently." Her words made me to come into the present situation. Thankfully she hadn't heard my calling of sanskar's name as she was standing some distances away from the car. I calmed down myself. I tried to remain placid & peaceful. So that swara couldn't detect my connection with him. Without wasting anytime, I took out sanskar & went inside her house.

Swara's POV:
As soon as I reached near my secret place, Laksh had already arrived there. He seemed absentminded. But I didn't concentrate much upon laksh as my prime focus was to save sanskar now. With in 1 hour all the arrangements were done. ECG machine, oxygen mask, life support system along with all the necessary equipments were organised perfectly in my room. What money couldn't do! For the first time in my life, I was happy for my richness. At least this money was useful to save somebody's life. Somebody ... Oops!! But why was I feeling something more for him?? I didn't know exactly what he meant for me but yes! His safety could blossom happiness in my face. Might be because if I would have been successful to save him then I would be got rid of the burden of his earlier favour to save my life as well.

Meanwhile Laksh put his hand on my shoulder & said,"swara! Let's begin the surgery.." My heart and brain were running fast as I wasn't a doctor & even I wasn't a mere intern as well. Still I was going to perform my first surgery under the guidance of laksh. Laksh was my only hope for this situation. With a painful tone, I asked," Laksh, can we perform this surgery positively?" Laksh in a very flat but determined tone replied,"Swara! We are definitely going to save him.. I won't let anything happen to him. He will be fine..." For some seconds, I looked at laksh in a surprising sight as he was the person who was earlier apprehensive about sanskar's condition & tried to avoid it in the name of police case but now I could feel the change in his body language. Might be the profession of being a doctor changed his sentiments, I thought.

My hands were trembling and shivering like hell when I was trying to remove the bullets. But to my surprise, laksh's hands were also shaking. He was a doctor & must had already performed many surgeries. Still his hands were trembling!! But my thoughts were diverted when Laksh was successful in removing the bullets from his body. After a long struggle of 3 hours, finally all the bullets were taken out & luckily the blood flow was stopped. Laksh had made the bandages perfectly in the fractured parts. But still sanskar wasn't out of danger as his heartbeats weren't normal. Laksh had kept sanskar under observation for 24 hours.

We came out of that room & I made coffee for us. While offering coffee to laksh, he said,"Swara! We need X-ray machine to examine the intensity of fractures of his bones.. I will arrange that as well." In a shocking tone, I said,"Laksh! Don't you want to shift him to the hospital as earlier you have emphasized on this only." Laksh just took the cup of coffee from my hand & while showing his back to me, he said," Swara! While operating him, I have seen guns in his pocket. Indeed this is a police case and if police will be involved then this patient can't be treated early. After all, saving a life is our first priority. So, after knowing the intensity of this case, I have agreed to your decision."

Unable to control my overflowing emotions, I hugged laksh & said,"Thanks for everything. You have threatened your career for me.." At once laksh murmured something which I couldn't hear. Changing the topic, laksh asked,"Do you know him, swara?" Now my mind was blogged. Honestly I didn't know its answer. Did I know sanskar? Apart from being my abductor, what had I known about him, I thought. Still why did I feel helpless in front of sanskar today? Why did I desperately want to save him? Laksh's single question created another set of innumerable question banks in front of me.

Breaking my thoughts, laksh said,"Swara! Have I asked anything wrong? If you don't feel like telling then it's OK for me." However laksh had tried to save sanskar's life. So, he had the right to know about the patient, I thought. I lowered my gaze & said,"He is sanskar, my abductor.." In a surprised tone, laksh asked,"swara! When have you kidnapped? And now you are dying to save your kidnapper... Why swara??" Without making any eye contact with him, I said,"I have kidnapped from your birthday party and ya! Once he has saved my life. So, it's just a payback & please don't ask me further questions, laksh."

Fortunately laksh agreed & didn't ask me any more questions on this topic. But he said,"swara! Now you take rest. I am here with sanskar.." Firstly I denied to laksh but after his so much persuasion, I agreed to him as indeed I needed rest. Till now I hadn't even changed my bloodstain clothes. So, I left sanskar with laksh & went to another room to take a short nap.

I took out my tracksuit from the shelves & just then my eyes fell upon sanskar's jacket. That jacket always gave me strength & courage to fight with difficult situations. I changed my cloths & grabbed that jacket & placed it close to my heart & thought,"I won't let anything happen to you, sanskar. You have taught me to lead my life in a positive way. I refrained from taking alcohol due to you. It's my second life which is gifted by you only. Now it's my responsibility to cure you & to take you out from that darkness...."


Credit to:Kashis

Tuesday, 10 May 2016

Swasan ff: An Incomplete Scrapbook (An Unusual Meet) Episode 7 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 10, 2016 with 10 comments
Swara's POV:
After successful project submission, I returned from Tuticorin. As my summer breaks were going on, I had decided to go for a long ride in night for a peace of mind. Night,the beloved fostered ray! When words faded & things came alive; when the destructive analysis of day was done & all that was truly important became whole & sound again; when the lovely stars blossomed in the infinite meadows of heaven, it was night. When a person reassembled its fragmentary self and its living spark had the ability of healing the dark, it was night.

I searched for the CDs of Michael Learns to Rocks as it was my favourite rock band. Night with melodious music created a shooting sensation in body. After a struggle of 5 minutes, I found the CD in the dashboard & put it in the music system.

"In my search for freedom
And peace of mind
I've left the memories behind
Wanna start a new life
But it seems to be rather absurd
When I know the truth
Is that I always think of you."

As soon as I heard these lines, I thought as if this song was designed for me only. I always wanted to run away from life. I indulged in toxicants to forget my pain. But all these things had happened until I met him, my kidnapper. After my escaping from that dark world, I left for Tuticorin to complete my project in a peaceful atmosphere. But whenever I went back to my memory lane, it was only him, whom I admired the most. In all my busy schedules, I tried to move on but in the calmness of nostalgia, his thoughts always haunted me.

"Someday someway
Together we will be baby
I will take and you will take your time
We'll wait for our fate
Cos' nobody owns us baby
We can shake we can shake the rock."

I just smiled after hearing this paragraph. We couldn't meet as we weren't destined to remain together. Whatever time might had passed, still we both were poles apart, like earth was on the opposite lane of heaven. I closed my eyes to digest this fact. Just then I sensed something collied with my car. Before I could roll over it, I opened my eyes & stopped the car quickly. I froze for a second after viewing the sight present in front of me. 'How can I be so careless? I just hit a person. What if he has died?' I panicked for a second but my profession taught me to handle these situations with tranquility.

I came out of the car & proceeded towards the person. His body was lying on the road & blood was rushing out of it. His backside was facing towards me. I reached on that spot & as soon as I rotated the body, I became motionless after seeing his face. He was none other than Sanskar, my abductor. Look at the irony of fate! What mockery it was playing with me. A few minutes before, I totally ignored about our further meetings but who had known that we would meet suddenly, even that to in this way...!!

He was lying lifeless in front of me. The oozing out of blood wasn't taking the name of stopping down. Self control, that was exactly what I had learnt from my academics of medical study. We all medical students were groomed in such a way that the patient was only a person whom we needed to cure.. We shouldn't feel the pain of the patient. However all the rules & regulations came to an end after seeing him in this vulnerable state.. So many thoughts were popping up in my head. 'Am I the reason for his vulnerable state? What if he is facing this condition due to my escaping?' I felt repentance.. At once I took his head on my lap & he saw me with his big eyes before passing out.

I screamed,"sanskar, get up." I patted his back but no answer was coming out of his mouth. The thought of loosing him, made me frightened. At once, I checked his pulse rate & thankfully it hadn't stopped. The road was engulfed with darkness & nobody was present there to help us. I checked him minutely from head to toe. He was beaten badly & even shot at many places. He needed urgent medical attention.. I had to admit him in the hospital.

Just then, my heart stopped me to admit him in the hospital. As a medical student of final year, I was aware about these situations & their outcomes. This entire incident seemed like a police case and after registration of the case only, the doctors could treat him. But if he hadn't given immediate medical care then saving him would be nearly impossible. 'How can I save him now?' This was the biggest challenging question of my life now. But somewhere inside the corner of my heart, a voice was echoing that no matter what ever unlucky circumstances might cross my path,but I couldn't let him die. He was my saviour. I got a second chance to live my life because of him... I couldn't let him extinguish his life.. But how? How could I save him?

I opened my mobile to call Ragini. But would she able to understand my situation? She would ask me thousands of questions. 'No',calling Ragini wouldn't solve my problem, my mind responded. While scrolling down the contact list, my eyes fell upon Laksh's number. I got the solution to this problem. Laksh was a doctor now & he could definitely try to save him & he was the only answer for this current problem..

Without any second thoughts, I dialed Laksh's number. As soon as he picked up the call, I said,"Laksh! This is swara.. I need your help urgently..." Laksh said from other side,"Swara! What a pleasant surprise! When have you returned from Tuticorin? And why have you changed your number?" Cutting his words, I said ," Laksh, I don't have enough time for these talks. I need your help to save a patient.." Laksh could sense my anxiousness & said,"Don't worry, Swara! Bring him to the hospital & I am reaching there in 20 minutes." I couldn't describe the whole situation to him now, so I just said,"Laksh! I can't admit him to the hospital. But please don't ask me why? However the patient needs immediate medical care. He is beaten badly and blood losses are uncontrollable from his abdomen & legs.. He has sustained many injuries and fractures."

Before I could say anything further, Laksh shouted,"Swara! This is a police case, and what are you doing with that patient?" I just pled laksh not to ask any more questions & said,"Laksh, please don't deny. Please help me to save this patient for the sake of our friendship." Laksh took a deep breath & asked,"What can I do for you, Swara?" I just suggested,"Laksh! I want all those medical instruments at my place. I hope you understand. Arrange all those equipments in half an hour from your hospital and yes! Address.. I am forwarding to you.."

Before cutting the call, laksh just warned me,"Swara! We are taking a big risk by risking our careers..." But I convinced him by saying,"Nothing is more precious than saving a patient & this is the first oath we have taken while joining this course.." Laksh was baffled with my answer as he knew that I was telling truth only. After cutting the call, I forwarded him the address of my secret place as that was the only place where sanskar would remain safe & out of anyone's reach. I completed the primary dressing of sanskar's wounds just as to safeguard him till my reaching to my secret place.. I covered his wounds with bandages present inside my car to control the further blood loss though it wouldn't help much.

With much difficulty, I dragged him towards my car & placed him in the back seat. I started the car & drove at a speed of 100km/hr to reach at my place as soon as possible. I was driving with high speed and also shocked at the travesty of destiny. The assassin was now on the verge of assassination and lying on the pool of bloodstains.. This was destiny and its foul plays were no longer ignorant to me.....

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Note: Guys I am so sorry as I could not upload yesterday. I was busy in college fest and it is going on for 4 days. So, I may be irregular for 4 days.. Please bear with that.. Sorry for this inconvenience.. But whenever I will get time, I will definitely update...

Monday, 9 May 2016

Swasan ff:An Incomplete Scrapbook (Unexpected Turns) Episode 6 Season 2

Posted by Saba Shiekh on May 09, 2016 with 16 comments
Sanskar's POV:
'You killed the innocent life, Sanskar.. I was so wrong.. You could never change..'
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Swara, at least listen to me.
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'Oh! You had also justification for killing a child.'
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But Swara, I couldn't denounce my captain's orders..
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'I thought of you as a nice person with humanity still intact in your soul. But I was so wrong, Sanskar.. You were just a mere puppet who only understood the meaning of killing..'
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Swara!! I just kept numb as I didn't get any reasons to prove her sayings wrong.
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'I didn't want to see your face Sanskar. I was regretting the moment when I came to know about you.'
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She was walking in the carpet of darkness by ignoring my voice. My heart was filled with warmth of her voice. Finally I lost her.
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'No.... Swara.... Stop.... Please..' And I woke up. I was panting heavily. The word 'Scare' wasn't in my dictionary. But truly this dream was enough to frighten a ruthless slayer, Sanskar Maheswari. 'Dream' was a 'Lie'. Truth was far away from it. I smiled feebly as all these talks weren't real & she didn't regret by knowing me. Just then another thought struck in my mind. I had to take a decision. Not to convert this dream into a reality, I had to neglect my captain's orders. Though captain was important to me, but I couldn't bear hatred in her eyes for me.

I called captain to express my inability to finish my next target. I dialed his number & as soon as he picked up, I said,"Captain... I am sorry.." From the other side, he asked,"Why are you asking for forgiveness? And have you convinced your target to sell his land to us?" I was panicking as how I could vent out my decision to captain & how would he react? In a very lower tone, I said,"Sorry captain.. He isn't interested to sell his land as it is his ancestral property and many memories are associated to him from that land.. What ever money we may give to him, still he won't sell the land, I suppose.." Now I could hear the laughter of captain & he said," Sanskar! You are behaving like an ordinary man. Don't forget, you are a slayer & if he isn't agreeing with our terms, then you know many ways to convince him. Do you think, this matter needs discussion?"

My captain wasn't getting my words.. I thought not to tell him anything now but suddenly, the face of swara & my mom flashed back in my memory lane & once my mom had said," Do it now.. As sometimes later becomes never.." Now I had got a chance & I couldn't let it go... After gathering much courage, I said in one go,"I can't perform this task, captain. I can't kill an innocent child. What is his fault if his father doesn't want to sell his property??" My captain said in a shocking tone," Are you in sense? You are rejecting my orders.. Don't forget, I am your creator, Sanskar & from when are you concerning for other's feelings?" I wasn't at all surprised by captain's sayings. As he was correct. I didn't look like a slayer now rather I was behaving like a sensible person. And it was all because of a target,Swara Suryavansi. Breaking my thoughts, my captain commanded,"I want this work to be completed in 2 days.. No more excuses, Sanskar..." Before I could say anything, the call was disconnected.

I was in dilemma. How could I avert this situation now? I thought of many ideas.. But not a single idea was convincing or appealing to me. One day was passed like this. Today was the last day to complete this task. Still I was scouring ideas & struck in chaos. Once my mom had said to me,"When the devil became one with the angel, humanity was born." Today I was realising the trueness of her saying. Swara, was indeed the cause of my growing humanity. Like the volcanic magma after rushing out of mantle determined its own path to settle as lava sheet & never obeyed anybody's authority, likewise now I had already challenged captain's orders & searching for my own path towards humanity. After so much calculations I reached to a conclusion.

I didn't know how much success it would bring to me but this was the last viable option for me.. I wore my mask & rushed towards this target's location. They were scared after looking at me. But I assured not to harm them & intact I was here to help them. I executed my plan. I transferred him along with his family to a safest place where nobody could find them easily and I could handle captain in my terms. Before leaving them, they blessed me for my long life. It sounded funny to me, as for a slayer every moment was deadly. Without replying back, I vacated the place & now I was coming back towards my dark world.

While travelling, I called captain and as soon as he picked up the call, I said,"Captain, they have escaped. I have gone to kill his son. But unfortunately, I have found the door locked." I lied to captain as I knew that if captain ever came to know that I was the person who helped his targets to reach to a safe place then captain wouldn't spare me & by lying, I could easily escape from killing his son. However unfortunately what I heard from captain, changed my life upside down.

With rage, captain yelled," You... Betrayer.. You have double crossed me.. You have helped this target & now you are lying that they have escaped. I am your creator, Sanskar. Where your thinking ends, mine starts. You have helped them na... But who will help you now?? There is no place of a betrayer in our world.. Run Sanskar.. Run for your life..."

My voice was choked. How could I even think to override captain's thinkings? Breaking my silence, captain yelled in his icy cold voice," You must be thinking, how I have come to know about it? I will tell you as last wish of every person shall be fulfilled. Then listen my slayer! The day you have reacted surprisingly after listening to the world 'killing', my doubt is developed. There is something which you are hiding from me, I have guessed. So, from 2 days Alex and Martin are observing all your moves secretly. You are my best slayer and perhaps may be the leader of this dark world after me, but seems like you have chosen your path to death. I am sorry to lose my best slayer but I can't spare a betrayer...." Before I could say anything, the call was disconnected.

In the night of prevailing darkness, I heard the firing of bullets & before I could guess anything, the tyre of my car burst. Hurriedly I came out of car & started running. I saw a car was following me. Till now, I understood that they were none other than Alex and Martin, who were trying to kill me. I opened my revolver & fired towards their car & punctured the tyre of the car & broke the glass door. As these happenings were going on far away from public dwellings, I was certain that today nobody could save me.

I was running aimlessly and the road seemed no end like in the open stretch of desert land, the sand dunes spread like anything & engulfed the existence of every creature within it, like wise Alex & Martin were following me like hell to extinguish my existence. I wanted to view a last glimpse of her before my death. I didn't have any cause left to live my life. Finally before dying, I could make eye contact with my mother proudly. It was all because of swara.

While I was in my own thoughts, a bullet pierced through my leg. I screamed in pain but I couldn't loose hope. As a best slayer, I randomly fired the bullet & Martin fell down. Just then, Alex fired all the 6 bullets towards me. 4 missed the target but 2 bullet hit me. Excruciating pain was spreading through out my body & I couldn't run any longer. Alex came running towards me and it seemed like his magazine was empty just like mine. He kicked me hard and I fell near a stone's throw away. Alex was smirking evilly like he had completed his revenge by killing me. But he didn't know that I carried one more gun with me for my double safety.

I wasn't called as a best slayer randomly.. Before Alex could reload his revolver, I picked up the gun from my right shoe and fired straight to his heart. 1 bullet was enough for him. He fell down on spot. Time was countable of my death. A last glimpse of swara was enough for my peaceful death. With much difficulty, I tried to walk towards her secret place. I didn't know how much time it would take.. I felt dizzy still I was limbing.

Just then a car hit me. Even a little strength wasn't left inside my body to react. Just then I saw her, like an angel she took my head in her lap. I must be dreaming, but it felt like a sweet dream & I closed my eyes to behold this sight forever till eternity.....


Credit to:Kashis